Regrets

Last night Miah and Shelly came over for dinner. It was so good to hang out with them. Jill and I did their premarital counseling and we really haven’t had any good quality time since then. They are still together so we figured that was cause to celebrate…and they are in love as well. (a tribute to epic counseling) I’m just kidding around…they are thriving in spite of scattered counseling. They just got back from Europe and we wanted to hear all about it…but we didn’t want to share them with any one else. Jill made chicken with stuffing and Shellamiah brought over chocolate whoopies. (this is my favorite dessert on earth and is also the perfect lead in to the statement, "that's what she said")

We talked about Europe and all the wonderful things they experienced. I saw pictures of huge art installations in the middle of cities, castles that are only seen in movies, and daisies fashioned in Miah’s beard. I heard stories of canoeing down channels and rivers, drinking on roof top bars, hitchhiking in the Alps, sleeping in train stations, and sipping wine at the base of the Eiffel Tower. I was absolutely fascinated by all of it. But nothing got my attention more than all the pictures of art in Shellamiah’s photo album. It was littered with images of art that Shelly and Miah stood face to face with. These are pieces that you see in books and magazines…like Andy Warhol originals and other famous people I don’t know. The thing that captured my attention was not the art itself, but the fact that these two got to have personal experience with something/someone they really respect. Not everyone can say that they have met their heroes. I’m jealous of that.

Later on in the evening the conversation took a left turn. We started to talk about regrets. I asked the question, “what is something from your past that you regret not trying?” I start it off by saying I wish I would have tried playing football in high school. I think I would have really enjoyed it. But my fear of failure was greater than my desire to experience. Jill chimes in and says that she wishes she would have tried doing sports. Most people don’t know this but Jill is a natural athlete. She has a perfect runners build and is naturally lean. During field day in elementary school, she would get first in all events she competed in…but never did anything after that. Maybe Jill is an Olympic athlete in hibernation. Shelly interjects and talks about always having the desire to become a hair stylist. Not just a super cuts stylist, but a “fancy” one. We all go on for about 20 minutes. Then we turn to Jeremiah and say, “what about you?” He responds with, “that’s a great question, I don’t know.” “Really nothing?” “Yah, I don’t know, I’m sorry, I’m really trying to think of something.”

Then it came to me. Maybe that says something about Jeremiah. What would your life look like if you didn’t have regrets of not trying? It really made me think. Jeremiah wasn’t being arrogant by saying he couldn’t think of anything. It was simply a testament to his character, “I guess I always tried.” So I ask myself the question, How would my life be different if I lived more like this? I think I would stop seeing life through books and magazines…I think I would try to meet some of my heroes face to face. Here is my final thought: When I’m old and dying, I think I would rather see my life full of failures than to have never tried…sometimes the most beautiful experiences are found in the wreckage.